Today 4/14/2006 Lance called me on my cell phone when I was riding to Everett with Robert Brooks to get a Business License for Everett, WA where Lance informed me the Veterans Hospital had told him to "Get his things in order". He had a heart attack a week or so earlier and it had apparently weakened his heart considerably. I greatly appreciated his informing me of all of this, but it had been a moment I had been preparing to hear for the past ten years.

We talked a little of how he would like his possessions dispersed generally handled by Paul our oldest brother, but hinted to the idea that he might want me to maintain his holding of Railroad Cars as part to a Train Club he had been a part for the last year or so of his life. As children our grandfather had brought the enjoyment of operating a train into our lives and I appreciated seeing him take up this interest to occupy some of his remaining time left.

I Loved Lance and with this bad news I expressed this same Love as I had done from time to time. I would miss him I know, but I would know where he would be going and I knew that I would see him again as well.

Later that evening I would speak to Lance again. Each time now more precious than before. Lance would now choose not to inform either of our brothers of his heart deterioration from the lack of interest shown over the many years of his life. When asked if he would tell Linnea, our aunt, he was very decisive to decline. He was now taking one day at a time and preparing himself to die and as they had shown little interest to make frequent contact not a part of their own lives, Lance was now choosing to keep them out of the sharing of his last days of life. I was proud to observe a sense of death with dignity in his speech to me. He would speak about how God had been using up his life to God's Will and Lance who hold great pride in the convictions he gave keeping information private for the sake of the Federal government.

Today is now 4/15/2006 and I just got off the phone with Lance at 2:34PM. Catching him on the bus heading to his new boarding place we talked about a new "wrinkle" to his health condition as he described a "Parkinson's-like" symptom where his head would shake uncontrollably. We discussed about Paul and how he feels that Paul has fallen away from the Lord, and how neither Paul nor Ira would make it a practice to communicate with their other brothers. Lance appreciated getting my daily phone calls and I told him of how this writing and maintaining a Diary/or Journal also seemed to have a therapeutic affect to my emotions. Lance expressed his disappointment in not being able to see all of us as close of a family as it had been when we were but children. We both acknowledged that any faults that Paul might otherwise have though were out of our controls and that the most anyone of could do was through prayer.

I would enjoy these daily talks because it was as if I was walking with him ever closer to the time that God would take him home to be with Him and where He was holding our mother's soul. It would not be long before he would be with her. For this I envied him greatly. When would God come to take me home? Lance had expressed a concern in how the contents of the Bible were being left more and more from the original word of God, making specific reference to the NewWorld Revised Edition. As a Speech Communication graduate I knew quite well of that truth and in how the totaly meaning of a verse can be changed simply by leaving out a word. Lance was describing now of how he did not even have enough energy to bring food to the table. His energy was now extremely low. He was pleased however in all the help he was being offered from those he knew in Spokane. Though he did not know how long his energy would hold, he was still hoping to be able to come to Seattle and to King's Garden High School to continue instructing what he could in the Javelin.

Lance also described a little more of what affect his heart attack was having on some of the VA doctors. He had found a Christian doctor there and as Lance would describe it, the doctors had never encountered anything like what his medical circumstances were bringing out. During Lance's heart attack, the doctors were experiencing failure at almost everything they were doing in trying to stabilize his body functions. We both felt that it was like a wake-up call from God in times like these. They would be required to give his heart two doses of nitro-like drugs before Lance's heart would start beating again.

What ever does happen and whenever it will take place, I would know that I was a constant friend to my brother throughout all of his life. I would now hope that I could go on with comfort in knowing that. Lance knew and would give me thanks for whatever patience it might have taken to continue to give as I did. Throwing out one of jokes to him, I would say something like "I should have been a Doctor with all the patience I had.". With a slight hesitation he caught the joke giving out a forced laugh letting me know that he saw the Pun.

It is not April 16, 2006 and I got a call again from Lance in the early evening giving me more details of his health condition. He would say that the pain was intense and far greater than even a 3rd degree burn and that the pain would creep up the body with the nervous system trying to shut down and with the body trying to fight against it. Lance said that during the eight days in the hospital each time these nerve incidents took place the doctors were holding his cheeks and screaming to him "You must stay awake!" over and over again. (I hope I get this next application right). Lance said that the doctors had given so much morphine to keep him awake during this time, that he indicated his question of was he going to have an overdose of the stuff.

The pain was great and was like a creeping snake moving towards the heart, but fortunately stopping prior to that point. Lance would explain how it felt if a heart went from total rest to the heart beating of a long sprint; his blood be over-oxygenated while having every muscle in his body cramping up inside. During the event he would go on to say that he would crack 3 - 4 of his teeth from the intense pain. The pain must have been intense for something like that to have happened. He would also say that these attacks would take place when the body was in its' most relaxed state and that he woke up to pain just this morning fearing that one of theses attacks might be taking place in his sleep.

Today, April 23, 2006 Lance's doctors were telling him not to do any exertion but did give him their blessings to travel to Seattle. Now walking with a cane will be a regular part of his routine but his interest in working with Kings Garden athletes would continue. I was so pleased to hear of his improved condition as he would continue to explain the loss of Magnesium from his body. Lance would say that the doctors were believing that the loss of this mineral came directly from the emit ion of radiation Lance was exposed back in 1990. Remembering what Lance had said about the details of most recent heart attack and the additional pains lead me to suspect that it may have been from that lack of Magnesium that may have been the cause of the heart attack in its role regarding the nervous system. This relationship to Magnesium was relayed to him from a new doctor assigned to his medical case. Lance held very high regards to this man's knowledge of the body workings and I could not help but be grateful as God would continue to give me hope that Lance's life would be allowed to continue.

On May 8, 2006, Lance called me again to ask me for my cellular phone number. Apparently, he had to go the hospital for another checkup. Each time he calls for any reason I am grateful to know that he is still alive. We did not speak much today but I could not help but prey and thank God for Lance's continued life. For the past two weeks Lance had been residing at one of Kings Garden's Athletic Coaches home and it had been giving great satisfaction to know that he was able to continue with his Love of Teaching promising students in the art form of throwing the Javelin.